Friends and Family,
Thank you dearly for your continued prayer and encouragement for our family! Drew and I have received more calls and texts than we can count saying you are praying for our sweet Sadie. She is already so loved and blessed by you; words cannot express our gratitude for that!
I wish I could sit down with each of you individually and share everything we have learned so far but due to the outpouring of love and support, there are just too many of you and there just isn't enough time... (what a blessing!)
Today we had a fetal CT scan at Children's Memorial Hermann Downtown. Our Maternal Fetal Medicine (MFM) doctor initially suggested an MRI but after speaking with other fetal specialists, they, as a team, felt that a CT scan would give a more accurate picture. We were instructed to check-in at my MFM doctor's office first. The radiologist did a very brief (less than 5 minute) ultrasound to see exactly where my uterus started and stopped and then used metal stickers to clearly define where the scan should be targeted. The scan itself took less than 15 seconds once I was positioned on the table. Modern medicine still blows my mind...the idea that a machine can draw a complete 3D picture of every bone in my unborn baby's body amazes me!
As far as CT results go...we have our follow up appointment tomorrow June 1, 2018 at 1:00pm. At this appointment our MFM doctors will do yet another in depth ultrasound (no complaints here, I love seeing my baby girl so often!!), sit down with our team of doctors and share the findings from the CT scan! Numerous people have asked me "Why do this testing? Is it going to change your mind about continuing the pregnancy?" The answer? ABSOLUTELY NOT! Our doctors have been wonderful to respect our wishes to carry this baby for as long as the Lord allows us to! The reason for the testing is so that the doctors know how to move forward with her care. We are unsure whether or not she will make it to birth but if she does, the doctors need to know how to treat her and be able to form a treatment plan and team to give her the best chance of survival!
The road ahead is long, unknown and quite scary. As I was talking with a friend at church on Sunday I was whining that I HATE not knowing what tomorrow will look like for our Sadie, what the next 5 years will look like for our family...She just smiled and said "None of us are promised tomorrow...no one knows what life holds..." It was a "should have had a V8" moment...Of course we don't...I know that...But this wasn't in MY plan! I took a step back and noticed that what I was mad about was the loss of my false sense of control. Any control we think we have is false... You can plan your life or even the next hour of your life...but its not guaranteed. I was grateful for the gentle reminder that God is in ultimate control...my grip is loosened and my hands are open.
"the LORD gives, and the LORD takes away; blessed be the name of the LORD." Job 1:21
~Jenny
Thursday, May 31, 2018
Wednesday, May 9, 2018
Sadie's Story
First of all, thank you for being here. The Lord impressed upon my heart to start this blog not only as a means to easily share updates and prayer needs but as a testimony of our baby’s life. I pray that this site will be a ministry and that God will use Sadie’s story to further His Kingdom!
So, let’s start at the very beginning. Hi, I'm Jenny. I am currently 19 weeks pregnant with our daughter, Sadie Hampton. My husband, Drew, and I have been married for 6 years and have an almost 4 year old son, Grant. We have had 3 miscarriages in the past (one before Grant, and two after). After our 3rd miscarriage we were referred to a Reproductive Endocrinologist to get more answers as to why this kept happening to us. I was diagnosed with PCOS (Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome) and given medication to help my body be able to sustain a pregnancy. After a few weeks on 1000mg of Metformin, I found out I was pregnant. Thankfully, everything seemed to be going really well, so at 14 weeks we announced our pregnancy to the world via social media. Just a few weeks later we had our 16 week ultrasound where we were told we were expecting a little girl. At that appointment we were told her femur was measuring a little small but it was still on track so nothing to be concerned with. Or so we thought...
This brings us to where we are now...
May 3, 2018 - (18 weeks and 2 days pregnant) I went into my doctors office for a little spotting. It wasn't too frightening because I had experienced spotting when I was pregnant with Grant, but for my own peace of mind I decided an ultrasound would make me feel better since I hadn't felt her kick yet. My doctor was out of the office so they scheduled me for an ultrasound and nurse visit. When they turned on the ultrasound machine I could immediately see her moving around and all fear was gone. I had noticed that the tech was taking a little longer than normal. She measured the babies femur at least 4 times. Each measurement came back about 4 weeks behind where it should have been. After she was through with the scan, she asked if I was scheduled to see a doctor, I replied no, that today was only supposed to be a nurse visit. She said "Okay, I'm going to see if there is another doctor that can speak with you..." This was my first inclination something wasn't quite right. I immediately felt more concerned than when I went in. The nurse came in and explained that my doctor was out of town but that she had another doctor look and he doesn't see anything wrong with the bleeding... She said nothing of the measurements. When I asked, she would only respond with "I'm going to have Dr. G call you in the morning." or "Your doctor will be able to give you more information...". Believe me, I know this is how she is required to respond but at that point I KNEW something wasn't right and I wanted to know what it was! When I got in my car I began googling to see what these particular measurements could mean...most of what I was finding was Trisomy 13,18 and 21. Of course my heart wasn't prepared for any of these but I had become okay with the thought of our baby having Down Syndrome, as long as it wasn't lethal like the other two...
The next morning (Friday, May 4, 2018) at 8:15am while eating breakfast at Chick-Fil-A with some friends the doctor called from his cell phone. He explained that the baby's femur and humerus measurements were weeks behind where they needed to be and that he wanted me to see a Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor. He then explained that he had already set an appointment that same day 9:45am because he didn't think I needed to go through the weekend wondering what was going on. Thankfully, Drew and his mom, Brenda, were able to meet me at the doctor's office. Little did I know the next hour of my life would be the worst yet. They did an ultrasound first, it took about an hour...I noticed the technician measuring and remeasuring the same bones they were worried about the day before. We could see on the screen that things didn't look exactly right...but at this point we still had no idea what was in store. After what felt like an eternity, the doctor came in. She was so soft spoken and kind. She began asking if anyone in our family had any birth defects or mental retardation. I began sobbing. She told us that the baby's bones were not developing properly and that she had a form a Skeletal Dysplasia. I began asking what that meant and how that would affect her into childhood. She gently put her hand on my knee and softly explained that the type our baby is presenting would likely take her life before she is born, and if she does make it to birth, she won't likely live for more than a few hours. I squeezed Drew's hand with what little strength I had left. He held on tightly as if to say, I'm not going anywhere, I'm here and we will get through this. The hours that followed were a complete blur...we met with a genetic counselor that went over additional testing we needed to have done, we called family, but mostly we wept together over the life of our girl.
We want nothing more than to have her here with us on earth, to watch her grow up, to take her to ballet lessons, to watch her walk down the aisle to marry the man of her dreams, and watch her become a mother herself but the Lord has made clear to us that He has other plans. We still don't know what lies ahead. Even day to day, how things will change, but we are praying for grace and strength to take each day as it comes. We ask for your prayers...prayers for healing for our girl. We know that God is the great physician and that with one breath He can restore our baby here on earth, but we also know that He may choose to ultimately heal her by taking her to Heaven. We are accepting His will. Its hard to comprehend at times like this but God loves her even more than Drew and I, and if her heavenly father decides to bring her home to glory, than we know that there is a purpose in that as well. God has big plans for her life, no matter how long or short it is.
As I mourn, the words of the old hymn It is Well replay in my mind, "Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, it is well, it is well, with my soul." It is so hard to surrender control and say "Whatever my lot"...whatever I have, whatever comes my way You, Jesus, have taught me to say, it is well with my soul. I am not fully there yet but I am working to get there, I want the Lord to be honored with how we, as a family, choose to respond to this devastation in our life. Jesus is a God of restoration and I know in His timing He will bring beauty from these ashes.
When sorrows like sea billows roll
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say
It is well, it is well, with my soul
With my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul."
Jenny
So, let’s start at the very beginning. Hi, I'm Jenny. I am currently 19 weeks pregnant with our daughter, Sadie Hampton. My husband, Drew, and I have been married for 6 years and have an almost 4 year old son, Grant. We have had 3 miscarriages in the past (one before Grant, and two after). After our 3rd miscarriage we were referred to a Reproductive Endocrinologist to get more answers as to why this kept happening to us. I was diagnosed with PCOS (Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome) and given medication to help my body be able to sustain a pregnancy. After a few weeks on 1000mg of Metformin, I found out I was pregnant. Thankfully, everything seemed to be going really well, so at 14 weeks we announced our pregnancy to the world via social media. Just a few weeks later we had our 16 week ultrasound where we were told we were expecting a little girl. At that appointment we were told her femur was measuring a little small but it was still on track so nothing to be concerned with. Or so we thought...
This brings us to where we are now...
May 3, 2018 - (18 weeks and 2 days pregnant) I went into my doctors office for a little spotting. It wasn't too frightening because I had experienced spotting when I was pregnant with Grant, but for my own peace of mind I decided an ultrasound would make me feel better since I hadn't felt her kick yet. My doctor was out of the office so they scheduled me for an ultrasound and nurse visit. When they turned on the ultrasound machine I could immediately see her moving around and all fear was gone. I had noticed that the tech was taking a little longer than normal. She measured the babies femur at least 4 times. Each measurement came back about 4 weeks behind where it should have been. After she was through with the scan, she asked if I was scheduled to see a doctor, I replied no, that today was only supposed to be a nurse visit. She said "Okay, I'm going to see if there is another doctor that can speak with you..." This was my first inclination something wasn't quite right. I immediately felt more concerned than when I went in. The nurse came in and explained that my doctor was out of town but that she had another doctor look and he doesn't see anything wrong with the bleeding... She said nothing of the measurements. When I asked, she would only respond with "I'm going to have Dr. G call you in the morning." or "Your doctor will be able to give you more information...". Believe me, I know this is how she is required to respond but at that point I KNEW something wasn't right and I wanted to know what it was! When I got in my car I began googling to see what these particular measurements could mean...most of what I was finding was Trisomy 13,18 and 21. Of course my heart wasn't prepared for any of these but I had become okay with the thought of our baby having Down Syndrome, as long as it wasn't lethal like the other two...
The next morning (Friday, May 4, 2018) at 8:15am while eating breakfast at Chick-Fil-A with some friends the doctor called from his cell phone. He explained that the baby's femur and humerus measurements were weeks behind where they needed to be and that he wanted me to see a Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor. He then explained that he had already set an appointment that same day 9:45am because he didn't think I needed to go through the weekend wondering what was going on. Thankfully, Drew and his mom, Brenda, were able to meet me at the doctor's office. Little did I know the next hour of my life would be the worst yet. They did an ultrasound first, it took about an hour...I noticed the technician measuring and remeasuring the same bones they were worried about the day before. We could see on the screen that things didn't look exactly right...but at this point we still had no idea what was in store. After what felt like an eternity, the doctor came in. She was so soft spoken and kind. She began asking if anyone in our family had any birth defects or mental retardation. I began sobbing. She told us that the baby's bones were not developing properly and that she had a form a Skeletal Dysplasia. I began asking what that meant and how that would affect her into childhood. She gently put her hand on my knee and softly explained that the type our baby is presenting would likely take her life before she is born, and if she does make it to birth, she won't likely live for more than a few hours. I squeezed Drew's hand with what little strength I had left. He held on tightly as if to say, I'm not going anywhere, I'm here and we will get through this. The hours that followed were a complete blur...we met with a genetic counselor that went over additional testing we needed to have done, we called family, but mostly we wept together over the life of our girl.
We want nothing more than to have her here with us on earth, to watch her grow up, to take her to ballet lessons, to watch her walk down the aisle to marry the man of her dreams, and watch her become a mother herself but the Lord has made clear to us that He has other plans. We still don't know what lies ahead. Even day to day, how things will change, but we are praying for grace and strength to take each day as it comes. We ask for your prayers...prayers for healing for our girl. We know that God is the great physician and that with one breath He can restore our baby here on earth, but we also know that He may choose to ultimately heal her by taking her to Heaven. We are accepting His will. Its hard to comprehend at times like this but God loves her even more than Drew and I, and if her heavenly father decides to bring her home to glory, than we know that there is a purpose in that as well. God has big plans for her life, no matter how long or short it is.
As I mourn, the words of the old hymn It is Well replay in my mind, "Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, it is well, it is well, with my soul." It is so hard to surrender control and say "Whatever my lot"...whatever I have, whatever comes my way You, Jesus, have taught me to say, it is well with my soul. I am not fully there yet but I am working to get there, I want the Lord to be honored with how we, as a family, choose to respond to this devastation in our life. Jesus is a God of restoration and I know in His timing He will bring beauty from these ashes.
"When peace like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say
It is well, it is well, with my soul
It is well
With my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul."
Jenny
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)